Letters from my clients can provide details about the results of my mediation work. Below are some such letters:
The following three letters came from two brothers with whom I worked. They wrote the letters in April of 2014. I’ve withheld their names to assure their privacy, which they preferred.
Client Brother One—Letter One:
While visiting Mom I told her about our mediation and breakthroughs, and gave her enough info so that she got and understood the big picture. I also presented her with your card as a gift and told her that your mutual contact and positive reference from both of us is our gift to her. We now have someone who we feel confident we can call if we have one or more issues which require mediation in the future. In response, Mom expressed her relief and gratitude and mentioned that she should have done this earlier. From my brother, Mom, and I thank you again very much for your mediation services. They have made a very positive difference for our family, and our family trust.
Client Brother 1
Client Brother Two, Letter Two:
Though my brother and I had tried to reconcile our differences without the need for a third party, we soon realized that we did indeed need an experienced mediator with counseling skills to help us. For we were trying our best to resolve a very sensitive and emotionally charged family financial issue that had been tearing our family apart. I can’t tell you how relieved we were to find you Kelly.
From the very first telephone consults we knew that you were the right person to help us through this most delicate situation. Your abilities to succinctly understand each party involved and their individual perspectives on the problem was, in and of itself, a relief for us. Once we had established a comfortable rapport with you Kelly, the next step was to begin our sessions. For me, your skilled objectivity combined with your well-formulated and nicely timed strategic challenges led me to seeing matters in a different way—the kind of way that brings about new insights, and more importantly, new choices on how we might best navigate these challenging family issues.
We both could tell that you were well familiar with this process of combined dispute resolution and family counseling. Your calm nature and expert verbal skills guided us through some of our most difficult issues of disagreement. After our two five or six hour sessions, my brother and I were finally able to arrive at points of mutual agreement that we did not think were possible. And by doing so we were able to re-establish our loving and understanding sibling relationship in ways that both of us had just about given up hope of ever returning to.
From this I am very happy to say that our family is at a point of far greater peace, and we are far more able to take on future issues that may arise. You have successfully taught us new working skills for both seeing the problems more fully and discussing the important issues less argumentatively.
It is with great confidence that I will be recommending you to others I encounter for any family matters that require an effective mediator and astute counseling skills. You were the right professional for us.
Client Brother Two
Client Brother Two—Letter Three:
I too wanted to thank you again. I often review the session we had in January, and recall quite clearly the many moments of dialogue that Saturday in January. Your abilities to thoughtfully balance our varied, and at times diverging perspectives; coupled with your assertive introjections and compelling reframing of key points, has left a most memorable impression of what we accomplished that day, and what challenges we may anticipate in the future.
Indeed, this process has helped us both take a closer look at what has transpired through the years and how we grew farther apart as brothers, though we both were attempting to do the very best we could under the circumstances we faced. Having your assistance truly helped us step back and see how our conflicting beliefs around “justified behavior” and our “differing thinking styles” could be seen more empathically.
I am quite glad to report that my brother and I are talking quite regularly about what happened then, and what this means for us today. Being that we’ve reached a far better state of mutual agreement we’re far more comfortable with “getting to brass tacks” of what truly matters from both our perspectives. He has been able to tell me about his deeper fears and opinions and I hopefully have been able to correctly paraphrase his perspective in terms that are accurate and meaningful. This is one skill I look forward to developing further.
And so, from this point we look forward to catching up for lost time and forging ahead to make a stronger union and more effective alliance for our family and our family trust.
Client Brother Two